Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Christmas is Cancelled

Sometimes I feel so reckless and wild
Sometimes I feel like a motherless child
I've given nobody life
I am nobody's wife
And I seem to be nobody's daughter
                         -Shawn Colvin

Aside from the fact that the above excerpt describes me exactly, I am easily the worst at wrapping gifts:

 That is honestly the a present I wrapped for a friend yesterday. Hideous...almost bizarre in in it's grotesque lumps.  It is as though a well-intention retarded child did it. (actually I guess that is true as well)

 Put all of these facts together, and the month of December is truly the most depressing one of all.  So, I have decided to completely cancel Christmas in my life and declare this the month of PLASTIC SURGERY.

Turn my frown upside down?  You got it!  Dr. Kevin in Beverly Hills can make that happen.  Eyes a little tired? Noooo problem, Dr. Kevin can sort that out as well.  Getting serious work done in December can also be a ticket out of any potentially unwanted family engagements.   Ohhhhh I would love to come! But I'm getting a mid-face lift that week.  Sooorrrryy!  

 Some light lipo followed by some fat injections and BAM!  I'll be ready for the New Year!   

Merry Boobjob and Happy Brow lift to you!




1 comment:

  1. At first I was really sad (Shawn Colvin??? Suicide music). And then I was really happy! This is a bit of an emotional roller coaster. Make sure to post on any surgeries, hot stuff.