Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Tricks AND Treats

Sigh, Halloween....The one time of year we can dress up like idiots:

Barry Kriegshauser as a midget Thor, me as Black Widow

Get on a Double Decker Bus (compliments of Amanda Miller):

Get your load on and miss your airplane the next day.

Thank you Amanda Miller for once again knocking it out of the park!  See you next year!


p.s. Barry, what are we going to be? Start thinking

Thursday, October 25, 2012

You can walk briskly on occasion but you can't hide

We touched on my fitness level a bit here so it wasn't a complete surprise when I had my blood work done for the first time in six years (apparently you should have this done every year..?) and it turns out I have high cholesterol.

Doctor:  You need to exercise every day.

Me:  Interesting.  Shouldn't I take a pill or something?

Doctor:  No.  Just the exercise.

Me:  Right.  Does walking count?

Doctor:  No, you need to get your heart rate up.

Ok, gotcha.  Message received.  And I choose life.  So I've started a humiliating regimen that I call sprinking.  That is me sprinting until I can't breathe (about 50 feet) and then walking until I can breathe again (about 300 yards).  And repeat.

This is going down every morning now so if anyone wants to join me stop by before 10.  Unless it is raining or snowing.  Or really cold.  Or hot.  Or something good is on the Today show.  Kidding about the last one I don't even watch that.



Monday, October 22, 2012

Shiver Me Timbers!

I had been wanting to do fish and chips whilst in London, but it's a crap shoot and if you get a bad batch, it can ruin your world for years.

My friends Paul and Ivan turned me onto this joint : The Golden Hind

73 Marylebone Lane
London W1U 2PN
Neighborhood: Marylebone
This place is hands down the Mecca of all fish and chip shops in the world. They were beautifully cooked.  All crispy, delicious, perfect batter and gorgeous cuts of fish.

I loved this food so much that I tried to make Tony (the owner) my new boyfriend. 

I love you Anthony Christou.  I had no idea Greeks were such masters of fish and chips! You definitely brought sexy back to the fish and chip world.


p.s. I personally blame you for my jeans not fitting.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

We're going to Paris!

Just kidding we are not going to Paris but Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck did and this is what Jen wore.

It looks like she just finished her shift as a file clerk in an insurance agency, slapped on her church pumps and wrapped a scarf around it for good measure.  This is what you bring to Paris?

I'm not saying I would wear this

I don't have the legs for it and I feel like purple makes me look sallow.  But my point is you're hot!  And you're in Paris!  Wear something sexy!

I think Cameron has it about right.




PS Sorry I said bam but I kept saying it to myself when I looked at this pic so I put it in there.

PPS Katie I'd like to see some pics of your Paris outfits.  Where are you anyway and when are you coming back?

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

It's on. (It's not on at all)

If you ever want to feel really bad about yourself, pick up a new sport in your forties.  Or in my case two new sports.  My guilt of not participating in any of my husbands top three favorite recreational activities (skiing, tennis and paddle) finally caught up to me, ten years in, and I decided to learn paddle and tennis this Fall.  After the first ten minutes of my first tennis lesson I was pouring sweat, red in the face and already needed a sports massage.  The second lesson yielded worse tennis and four injuries, including random forearm, shin and finger bruises.  First paddle lesson was about how it's the opposite of tennis.  And two more injuries.

The things we do for love.  (It just occurred to me that I could pass these lessons off as an anniversary gift!)  Now I need to run, I have an epsom salt bath waiting.


Saturday, October 13, 2012

Don't knock it till you try it

When traveling abroad, one comes across all sorts of whacked out shit, but this one took the cake for me.  I have seen peanut butter and jelly mix ups in the States, but I'm fairly certain I've never seen these combos.

I can kill a ketchup/mayo combo on a burger and for sure a mustard/ketchup combo on a dog, but what exactly makes this stuff "swiss quality"?  And when in the eff did the Swiss become the benchmark on condiments?  I thought that was our turf!


p.s. this product was found on the fifth floor of Harvey Nichols in London


Thursday, October 11, 2012

Confessions of a mum hater

(I'm referring to the flower not the ladies who have birthed and/or raised British children.)

When I first moved to this east coast town I noticed that in October every resident buys and displays mums in front of their house.   It's just the way things are done, like some unspoken agreement.  I wanted to be a gamer and give this a try but I realized pretty quickly that I just can't with the mum.  I don't like anything about them.  Every color makes me angry and aggressive.  I've never told anyone except my husband because I felt like I would be considered some kind of deviant.  I just kept trying the different colors year after year and accidentally (on purpose) didn't water them until they died.  It's been five years and I don't want to hide anymore.


Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Underachiever alert

That's my boy.  Don't put too much pressure on yourself.


Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Why?.....Why Not?

As I've mentioned a few times before. I love TLC and their programming.  Since the premiere of Abby & Brittany, I can't stop trying to pose like them.  Here are a few examples:

Amy Stinson and myself

Adam (Hannah's Hot Ginge) & myself

And finally, my all time favorite:

Taryn Ruffin and myself
This could be the gift that keeps on giving, as Harvey Nichol's windows have joined in the fun!


Thursday, October 4, 2012

WHAT??? It's not MY fault! (disclaimer: unfunny)

After coming home from another fun but rather long journey I picked up my sweet and fat dog Dolly.  She was acting crazy like a nutter butter.  Chewing herself, running around, hot spots everywhere.  36 hours and a sleepless night later, I took her to the vet only to find out she had a major flea infestation.

This is where I find people interesting. 

My dog has fleas, so people want to blame someone, anyone.  Here were some of the explanations I heard: "Oh it must be the kennel's fault", " It's those bad, un-fixed dogs she runs with at the dog park", "Global warming has made flea season bad".

The only person responsible for my dog having a flea infestation is ME!  I've been running around, too busy to remember to mind my sweet bitch and her well being.  I had lapsed in her frontline treatments.  That simple.

If you don't mind your dog, she'll get fleas.

Why do we blame other people / make other people suffer for things that have nothing to do with a situation? 

End the blame game.  Whenever you point a finger, there are three more pointing back at you.


Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Don't drop a star...EVER

Dirty Basement (aka Ballsack Basement)

My sister Amy and I regularly meet in Kansas City to watch Chiefs games.  9 times out of 10, we stay at the Intercontinental on the Country Club Plaza.  It's a lovely joint, great rooms, great views all good.  On this last trip, I thought I would try Priceline-ing a room.  I put in a bid for $125/night for a 4 star hotel.  It was quickly denied, so I changed my bid (as you have to for Priceline to submit it again) to 3 stars at $100/night.  It was quickly accepted by Embassy Suites!  (this alarmed me a tiny bit...but eff it, it was going to be one night)

As if the massacre by the Chargers wasn't depressing enough, I walked into the above pictured situation.  A dark, cold, damp and musty basement-looking bar with men hanging their junk about like they were at home.  It was horrifying.

Taking off that one star...that one tiny star was like jumping off the Empire State Building.  There wasn't even a comparison.  In fact, I think they tried to sell this joint as 3 1/2 star hotel.  Um, seriously?  Maybe if you are growing mushrooms.

How dare you Priceline.

I still love you Kansas City.